Posted by: bellebelle | April 3, 2006

How Do I Study?

I was pondering, how has my study life been? How do I study? Many would have thought, “cheh, you design student mah, don’t need to study wan, just draw a few strokes mah can lorr.” Woo, I would then say “Ouch.” Suppose many of you design dudes would agree.

*breath in*

You see, MYR3,150 per term for my foundation course (3 terms in a year). 3,150 divide 7 subjects = MYR450 per subject. Or make it this way, MYR3,150 divide [20 hours (per week) X 15 weeks] = MYR10.50 an hour.

*breath out*

How can you pay MYR10.50 an hour to just draw a few strokes???!! If you were to order a meal of MYR10.50 from McDee’s, you’ll definitely not just take the ketchup ONLY, right? Undeniable, there are some people who do that, all they aim for, is the diploma certificate…

What you gonna do after graduation (if you can)?
(if I can) I will get married at young age.
0_0! Err, so, why are you here?
To get a job with my diploma just in case my husband divorces me.

What you gonna do after graduation?
I don’t know.
0_0! Err, so, why are you here?
I don’t know.

What in the world has gone wrong with these people?

Okay, frankly speaking, I am not a straight A scorer, neither am I an utterly brilliant student. Principle Tatsun said he doesn’t believe much in talent, as long as you’re willing, practice hard, you will soon get what you deserve. Yupp, you reap what you sow, which I truly agree.

I am more of the wild type, which I will go beyond my limits and put myself into experiment. I self-learned HTML at the age of 15, then I’ve discovered image editing software(s), followed by freelance projects and many design related thingy. I’m so into it which took plenty of my time and had less passion in my study syllabus.

At the same time, I was involved in leadership and so tied up with co-curriculum activities; it got me so distracted and decides to just let it be. I made myself as one of the chemical solutions in the experiments; I tried mixing myself with many different liquids to observe the changes. If it works, the outcome would be more than I could comprehend. If it doesn’t, it will be such a waste of time + energy + sources.

I succeed and failed at the same time. I manage to build my portfolio which leads me to a 4 years degree scholarship at the UK. I manage to build a wide network, known a lot of people from different industries. I manage to build good relationships with people in and outside my school compound. But when I was supposed to be a SPM student, I failed tremendously to make my goals come true, which is scoring 8 As and above for the Malaysia Certificate of Education or what you called Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia. I ended up having only 2.

Tatsun warned us not to experiment by ourselves, but others. Listen to their advices, learn from their mistakes. Why? Simply because we can only risk once, no turning back. Yes, I took the risk for my SPM years > only 2 As > no turning back. I even thought of retaking SPM at that point of time, but I knew it wasn’t necessary. It’s all because of being prideful, which I wanted to prove to the world, “Gabrielle can study!” But after a long consideration and a period of seeking advice, I conclude that isn’t a wise decision at all. Why do I have to prove to everyone that I am smart if I choose to study in ways which digress from being smart?

At times I push myself too hard until I forgot that I actually needed to slow down for some relaxing hours. I’ve always enjoyed rewarding myself a good treat or whatsoever. However, it’s coming to the end of my foundation year. Am so tied up with academics, activities, obligations, relationships; I’ve got less relaxing time to spend with. There will be some time that I feel so exhausted, I feel in need of a break, but after a few second, I will wipe it off my reminder list. I became so happy-go-lucky for the problem, to the extend that I forgot all the exhausting periods I once had.

It’s gonna be either an awesome blast or a dreadful bomb.



  1. Oh my goodness. thx for sharing this with all of us. I, especially enjoyed reading this post. Simply to put it, I can relate most of it :)

  2. hehe mui, aza aza fighting!!

  3. as-94783-sa

    I am Nora. I admit it.

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