Posted by: bellebelle | November 8, 2006

Because of His Unconditional Love

my stomach is not in it’s norm ever since the rotten-potato thingy, which happened about 2 weeks ago. i don’t feel like myself, not being able to eat as much as usual nor enjoy food as usual. it’s either throwing ’em out or loosing appetite for once.

i.. loathe being under medication. many urged me for a visit to the doc’s. eek~ no way!! Yan Feei is so cute, she wanted to call my dad to bring me to the doctors. imaginably, i rejected. she then tried to scream, so my bro could actually hear her voice thru the phone receiver.

somehow, chocolate saves the day. i’m thankful for my jar of chocolate collection & the contributors to it. *hugs*

it was a breezy morning, while praying with dearie Corrinne & Bee Gaik.. i said, “love is difficult”. i thought a long walk out will do me good. there’s too much tension in the air, and i’m one of the major contributor. the matter of fact is, i am always the one running, running away from situations. i reckon i’m still sick, sick of myself. despite all these self-condemnation, i am still well loved. i can’t wait to get my feet stepped on the sandy beachside; i can’t wait to have a special date with my Big Man.

daddy’s not going off on the 9th, i’m so thankful for the flight cancellation. even if i don’t tell him i’m unwell, i wanted him to stay by my side, because he always care the best. he always make me feel better. today, i wish he could play the harmonica for me & will not forget bout the lovely goodnight kiss.

am listening to Vanilla Sky’s soundtrack, come to think about it, haven’t i watched the movie, but am here listening to the soundtrack, weird. how could i miss out Tom Cruise & Penélope Cruz & Cameron Diaz & Kurt Russell? over 60% of the reviews were negative, so what? i want at least a peek of the film. a film with such soundtrack with such emotions couldn’t go that worse.

talking bout movies.. i don’t go on single date anymore. alto i fancy the popcorn feeding, coke sharing, jacket providing. no more, because it’s inappropriate, i’m so sorry. nevertheless, we can make movie trips happen, only with more acquaintance. :)

5pm, felt hungry. fell asleep in the afternoon when i should be eating. missed lunch, missed Jun Meng & Sim’s online messages.

7pm, “i’m so dead”, i thought. i’m gonna be late for yet another appointment. the rain & thunder frightened me a few times, it was so intense, it tripped my dad’s car alarm system a few times. it poured so heavily, i’m afraid my dear ones would get hurt on their way back home. the fear did not stop until i decided to kneel & write a prayer request.

11.30pm, came home after sitting in a bible study session with Danielle. in my final prayer of the day, i said, “love is difficult, but.. God, you love me.” i wish Danielle could see the importance of knowing this God of love, and that i’m able to be one of her inspiration.

thanks dearie Sim so so much for doing such a great job in studying with Danielle, each & everytime i get so so convicted. *huggles* i don’t speak much isn’t because i was insecured, it was because i am always amazed & am always overwhelmed by your ability in sharing your faith. thus far, i think it’s really cool! at the same time, i see that you’re always prepared & ready, always very firm bout your objective while you do the studies. i think i need to be challenged to open my mouth to speak & share more, too. >___<

12.51am, daddy slept, he did not forget bout the goodnight kiss, for me.

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Responses

  1. dearie, haha, guess im the first visitor 2day! Could not sleep at 5.45am, so jz thot of doing sth, wanting 2 search 4 some crouchette thing online… Well, ganbatte, dun b overwhelm by wat u heard during d study, even though u r nt d one doing d study, bt b prepared as if u r d one hu do d study.

    Well, yesterday’s study bombed. manage 2 watch my “The Gateux” final episode, so touched, and so fake ^^ set another time w jun on monday, bt being reminded by pei sia v hv evan… so… c hw God works la! ^^

    爱你哦!

  2. hi dearie,

    knowing loving someone is also difficult because is not our human nature. But dear, i know you doing very well because you never fail to love people around you and this can be testified by a lot of people. Gambate ya !! always Genki Genki, when u need love, the small group is always there to provide ^-^. MUAKS + HUGGIE!!

  3. 女朋友 >> ボーイフレンド ♥ 你!!

    seh yen >> genki genki~ *hug tight²*

  4. i love u…

  5. sheep >> dear dear dear dear i love you too~


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